I’ve been sitting alone on my back porch for far too long, staring at a blank document, hoping it will write itself. You see, what I want to write about is not an easy subject. I feel unequipped to shed light on this ever-changing journey that I’m on. So, I grab my softest pink sweatshirt, wrap my fingers around a condensation-covered glass of water, watch the wind blow through the grapevine leaves in my backyard, and think about my life going forward.
Desserts rarely come in two. Neither do families but here we are. The world isn’t equipped for two. Daniel and I always seem to end up with two empty chairs at our dinner table. We’ve thrown out too many burger buns to count and have been stuck with the pull-out bed in the living room of whatever vacation home we’re renting with friends or family. When you’re just a family of two, no one really knows what to do with you.
This last week I was jabbed in the gut by a passive aggressive comment about our “decision” to not have kids while we were young. If I may quote… “By the time you have kids, you’re going to get cancer and die and miss out on their life”. I wish I was kidding. It’s hard to explain in one response how our conversations went from “when” to “if” and then to “what if” in the matter of four painful years. Realizing I don’t have to explain myself, I smiled and nodded, and made a mental note for retaliation at a later date.
Certainly, majority rules. I understand why they sell eight burger buns to a package. I understand carpool lanes, and I agree that no one needs to give us the master suite. But just once I want to win. I want to feel the comforts of normalcy. But really, I just want a recipe with no waste. And so, my little recipe for Strawberry Crumble for Two was created. For me, for you. For my single friends, for my twosomes, for my widows, for my husband: we all deserve to feel normal for once. And, it might just be as simple as a recipe.
If I were to define my life it would be washed with anecdotes of happiness and moments of overwhelming joy. I hardly recognize those empty chairs anymore, and I claim them for my purse. I don’t feel like I’m missing out. I breathe in the smell of fresh cut grass the same as the next, and I get overwhelmed by the way moonlight reflects into his big, dark eyes. We are all more than what we are less than.
Hear that today, friends. We all have something that makes us feel a little different. In big ways and small. Let’s make a pinkie promise to celebrate those differences. There are always blessing to be found in struggles. I believe that with all my heart. So go out and find them. Find the smallest joys in the biggest heart breaks. Seek thankfulness in unique circumstances. And be content in the waiting.
Love you more than cake,
Karlee
Strawberry Crumble for Two
A little recipe for a little victory. This Strawberry Crumble for two is a no-waste recipe for a small family. Perfectly simple.
- Prep Time: 15 minutes
- Cook Time: 30 minutes
- Total Time: 45 minutes
- Yield: 2 servings 1x
Ingredients
|| Filling ||
1 1/2 cups strawberries, sliced
1/4 cup sugar
1 tablespoon corn starch
|| Crumble ||
1/3 cup flour
1/3 cup oatmeal
1/4 cup sugar
1/4 cup salted butter, melted
1/4 teaspoon almond extract
pinch of salt
Instructions
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.
Toss sliced strawberries with sugar and corn starch, and place in a small casserole dish or dived between two ramekins.
Toss the crumble ingredients together in a small bowl until the mixture is pea-sized. Sprinkle crumble on top of the strawberries and bake in the oven for 30 minutes.
Let cool for 30 minutes.
Keywords: strawberry, crumble, cobbler
Dear Karlee, with strawberries in season I have all the ingredients, so it’s perfect timing for your strawberry crumble recipe. I hope I haven’t missed your next workshop, you are such a great mentor❤️
Awe, Jamie!!! Thank you so much!! You have warmed my heart. You haven’t missed any workshops. We put them on hold this summer so we can move to Portland (we currently live an hour outside of PDX) Workshops start up again this fall! No official dates yet but there should be soon!
Girl, I understand. In my own way, of course, so not exactly. We were a family of two until I was 37. Now we are a family of three and will remain that way. Which, invites it’s own ignorant comments. “But your son, he’s going to be all alone!” Bleh.
Thanks for being vulnerable and sharing your story so hopefully the world can be a little more aware and whole lot more sensitive.
Also, let’s share burger buns.
Oh Lora, Lora… You’re the best. It’s so true. Comments come in all shapes and sizes. Bleh is right! haha Let’s definitely share those burger buns. I’m all in 🙂 Thanks for sharing with me!
Karlee, thank you for sharing this; I have had so many jabs by other woman how I “wouldn’t understand their hectic lives,” because I don’t have kids. Maybe they could have taken a moment to think how painful it is for me to not have that opportunity; Especially as a single woman in her 40’s I feel branded as an understudy in my own life;
I mean… EXACTLY!!! You are so right! I think life is crazy with kids but, shoot, life is crazy no matter what. We fill up our time. I’ve had that exact comment made to me in the middle of an 80 hour work week that lasted two months. I mean… I was barely holding it together. But, girl, you are amazing! Not having kids is a heavy burden at times. I wish with all my heart that “understudy” could be lifted from your resume. You’re the best. I already know it. It’s decided 🙂
I am second-hand fuming on behalf of you right now. I’m not sure that I would have had enough self-control to not reply to such a tactless comment. My fella and I have decided not to have children for several personal reasons and I find myself keeping it to myself or deflecting the question more often than sharing our choice because I almost always receive replies along the lines of “how could you be so selfish?” or “you’ll change your mind someday.” The “you’re already in your 30s, you’re going to be too old to have a baby soon.” is the absolute worst. It always makes my hand twitch.
I always feel that their reply is self-serving to their own needs or desires, but does not consider how our choice ultimately impacts me and my partner. Whether you do not have children by choice or inability, I fully believe that is between you and your partner only and you do not owe anyone an explanation. People need to learn to bite their tongues.
On a better note, this crumble looks scrumptious and I love the bit of almond extract you’ve added.
ha! love the way you ended this comment 🙂 You are so right. It is a complete personal decision. Movies and television are the WORST when it comes to these expectations. I always get the impression that “the career woman” is a bad word and that we’re selfish if we don’t reproduce. it’s weird. One of these days, I’m going to freak out at an ignorant comment. Until then I’m trying to handle it with grace and tact. LOL we’ll see how long that lasts! 🙂
Nothing but big ol’ puffy hearts for you. Thanks again, for your rawness and your articulate words.
As I’m getting older (vintaging myself) I am trying to be more aware of struggles others face-especially because we’ve all spurted off comments we mean no ill-will from, but that doesn’t mean that they don’t leave ripples in others.
And you know what? I might just make this recipe for two, and eat it all myself
Ha! I just love you, Ashley! It’s true. I am POSITIVE I’ve said some ignorant things. Which is why I tried to give this person grace. But also, because they probably didn’t want to hear it anyway. You you make this recipe, girl. Keep it all to yourself!
It is amazing how it is so easy for some to not think before they speak. Everyone has a story and often it is one left untold. Thank you for being vulnerable. I believe that vulnerability helps other see and hopefully learn to be more thoughtful in their speech. I know I’ve learned a thing or two over the years.
And this recipe looks so yummy!
Thanks so much. It’s not the easiest to be vulnerable but it always pays off in the end. Happy to able to shed light on this!
I celebrate you, my friend. Love you. <3
You’re the best!! Love you!
Karlee I am making this amazing strawberry crumbled tonight for dessert! Your story really hits close to home, except differently. I have two beautiful children with my ex, daughter is 21 and son is 13 (with an attitude lol). Then I married the best man this worlds ever known. Our love was more pure than any love I’ve ever heard of, he was my best friend and my other half. My daughter lives with her boyfriend and my husband passed away four years ago, when my husband passed away my son’s dad filed for full custody of my son and with the cost of moving back here to Oregon and funeral costs and medical bills I didn’t have the money for an attorney and so I lost custody. So my family got small very quickly, now it is a family of one except on the weekends. But life is beautiful and I always tell my son I got him for the first nine years it’s only fair that his dad get some for the next 9 and as long as I pay his cell phone bill they allow him to talk to me whenever he wants and I get him weekends and summer arms winter breaks. I guess it’s just the way that you choose to look at life and I know my husband would want me to try to look at the positives not the negatives. Anyways I will tag you on Instagram with pictures of the strawberry crumble after I make it. And bless you for all these amazing recipes, I’ve always loved cooking and baking, you have me so inspired as I look through the recipes that you put on here. Cannot wait for a workshop!
★★★★★
Honestly, so heartbreaking! I’m so glad you can find comfort in my words, story and recipe! Means a lot to me. I can’t thank you enough for reaching out. I saw you made this on Instagram but now I can’t find it!!! sorry for not getting back to you sooner… it’s been a crazy week/weekend.
A great way to get the crumble smaller is to use a pastry cutter or just use a really soft/room temp butter!
Thanks again, so much, Amy!
Karlee
First of all, this recipe is AMAZING!! I can’t believe how easy it was to make. Few ingredients, and almost no time. The hardest part was waiting for it to cool.
On another now… WOW. People can be the worst. It is so heartbreaking to hear. But I am blown away by your response to not respond. You continue to amaze me with your grace. And this strawberry crumble for two being born out of this sounds like a win to me!
Sending love your way <3
★★★★★